Overview

A candid assessment of the pros and cons of delayed motherhood. Biology does not bend to feminist ideals and science does not work miracles. That is the message of this eye-opening discussion of the consequences of delayed motherhood. Part personal account, part manifesto, Selvaratnam recounts her emotional journey through multiple miscarriages after the age of 37. Her doctor told her she still """"had time,"""" but Selvaratnam found little reliable and often conflicting information about a mature woman's biological ability (or inability) to conceive. Beyond her personal story, the author speaks to women in similar situations around the country, as well as fertility doctors, adoption counselors, reproductive health professionals, celebrities, feminists, journalists, and sociologists. Through in-depth reporting and her own experience, Selvaratnam urges more widespread education and open discussion about delayed motherhood in the hope that long-lasting solutions can take effect. The result is a book full of valuable information that will enable women to make smarter choices about their reproductive futures and to strike a more realistic balance between science, soc

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9781616148454

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<p> As a fertility specialist, I am confident that this book will be a wake-up call for the many women who are (voluntarily or involuntarily) postponing reproduction. I applaud the desire of Selvaratnam to dispel myths and tell the truth about the 'biological clock.' We cannot 'rewind' it, but today we can stop it with egg freezing. This technology is powerful, revolutionary, and will change the lives of women in the twenty-first century. <br>--Pasquale Patrizio, MD, MBE, professor, reproductive bioethicist, and director, Yale Fertility Center; coeditor of A Color Atlas for Human Assisted Reproduction <br> We all have to take responsibility for our choices, but what happens when we don't know we are making a choice? What if we thought we were solving when but realized the question was whether or not ? Selvaratnam bravely shares her heartbreaking, exhausting, and ultimately enlightening experience of being blindsided by fertility problems. Haunted by hindsight, she perseveres in her desire to have both a successful artistic life and a baby. Selvaratnam engages us without sentimentality or self-pity and, in the process, helps us all understand that there are ways to achieve our personal hopes and dreams when given honest information, guidance, and support. <br>--Catherine Gund, documentary filmmaker and cofounder, Third Wave Foundation <br> With vulnerability, insight, and honesty, Selvaratnam uses her personal journey with health, fertility, and career to illuminate one of the biggest issues of our era. Have women lost out on fundamental happiness by following the call to have it all--a family and a career? How can women and men reshape the losses of our time into better choices and better outcomes? Selvaratnam takes us inside her medical and emotional journey and uses the stories of women across the country to examine how to put an end to 'the big lie.' <br>--Farai Chideya, television and radio journalist; author of The Color of Our Future <br> T

<p> Forty may be the new thirty, and women are looking and feeling younger than their years--but try telling that to your ovaries! There is a disconnect between what women see in the mirror and what's happening to their reproductive organs. Selveratnam's book will help women better understand their biological age and fertility health. It will also educate on the incredible advances being made in fertility treatment so that women are informed about their fertility options and choices. So pleased that Selveratnam is furthering this dialogue. <br> --Carole Kowalczyk, MD, board-certified reproductive endocrinologist; director Michigan Center for Fertility and Women's Health; founder, in Harmony Healing Center; founder, Seasons of Life Fertility Foundation <br> As a fertility specialist, I am confident that this book will be a wake-up call for the many women who are (voluntarily or involuntarily) postponing reproduction. I applaud the desire of Selvaratnam to dispel myths and tell the truth about the 'biological clock.' We cannot 'rewind' it, but today we can stop it with egg freezing. This technology is powerful, revolutionary, and will change the lives of women in the twenty-first century. <br>--Pasquale Patrizio, MD, MBE, professor, reproductive bioethicist, and director, Yale Fertility Center; coeditor of A Color Atlas for Human Assisted Reproduction <br> We all have to take responsibility for our choices, but what happens when we don't know we are making a choice? What if we thought we were solving when but realized the question was whether or not ? Selvaratnam bravely shares her heartbreaking, exhausting, and ultimately enlightening experience of being blindsided by fertility problems. Haunted by hindsight, she perseveres in her desire to have both a successful artistic life and a baby. Selvaratnam engages us without sentimentality or self-pity and, in the process, helps us all understand that there are ways to achieve our personal hopes and dreams whenh

A courageous, deeply personal, and unapologetically feminist exploration of delayed motherhood and infertility. This enlightening and empowering book should be required reading for every woman. --Hillary Jordan, author of Mudbound and When She Woke Forty may be the new thirty, and women are looking and feeling younger than their years--but try telling that to your ovaries! There is a disconnect between what women see in the mirror and what's happening to their reproductive organs. Selvaratnam's book will help women better understand their biological age and fertility health. It will also educate on the incredible advances being made in fertility treatment so that women are informed about their fertility options and choices. So pleased that Selvaratnam is furthering this dialogue. --Carole Kowalczyk, MD, board-certified reproductive endocrinologist; director Michigan Center for Fertility and Women's Health As a fertility specialist, I am confident that this book will be a wake-up call for the many women who are (voluntarily or involuntarily) postponing reproduction. I applaud the desire of Selvaratnam to dispel myths and tell the truth about the 'biological clock.' We cannot 'rewind' it, but today we can stop it with egg freezing. This technology is powerful, revolutionary, and will change the lives of women in the twenty-first century. --Pasquale Patrizio, MD, MBE, professor, reproductive bioethicist, and director, Yale Fertility Center We all have to take responsibility for our choices, but what happens when we don't know we are making a choice? What if we thought we were solving when but realized the question was whether or not ? Selvaratnam bravely shares her heartbreaking, exhausting, and ultimately enlightening experience of being blindsided by fertility problems. Haunted by hindsight, she perseveres in her desire to have both a successful artistic life and a baby. Selvaratnam engages us without sentimentalitye

Author Information

Tanya Selvaratnam (New York, NY) is an independent producer, writer, activist and theater artist. Recent productions include the short film series, Beginnings, which won the Webby Award for best online documentary series; the theatrical show, World of Wires, at The Kitchen in New York, which won an Obie Award for best direction; and ongoing collaborations with artists and directors such as Carrie Mae Weems, Chiara Clemente, Catherine Gund, and Mickalene Thomas. Since 2008, she has been the Communications and Special Projects Officer for the Rubell Family Collection. As an activist, she has worked with the Ms. Foundation for Women, the Third Wave Foundation, the NGO Forum on Women, and the World Health Organization. Learn more at www.about.me/tselvar.

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