Overview

This book contains 250 stories on various topics. For example: 1) Lou Costello of Abbott and Costello fame was a master at getting perks from his movie studio, Universal Pictures. Deanna Durbin was the star actress on the movie produc-tion lot, and she had a trailer that served as her dressing room; therefore, Mr. Costello wanted trailers for him and for his partner, Bud Abbott. After making his pitch for the trailers to a Universal executive-and having his request turned down-Mr. Costello said that he would be reasonable, and he would show up for work on time, and he would know his lines. He paused, and then added, But I don't know how funny I'll be. He and his partner each got a trailer. By the way, Mr. Costello enjoyed gambling, al-though he lost a lot of money that way. Once, he bet $50,000 on a horse that had a big lead. Mr. Costello turned to a friend, smiled, and then said, The only way my horse can lose is if it stumbles and falls down. The horse stum-bled, fell down-and lost. Also by the way, Mr. Abbott and Mr. Costello once gave the gift of a suitcase to their movie director, Arthur Lubin, a very dignified man. As they gave it to him, the suitcase fell open, and hundreds of condoms fell out. 2) Like other employees, Walt Disney ate at the concession stand at the Disney Studio. One day, he sat at the counter and ordered just a coffee. A stray dog came in with him, without him noticing, and Mary Flanagan, who ran the concession stand, said, I'll have to call the guard. I don't know where this dog came from. Walt said, He's proba-bly hungry. Give him a hamburger. Mary gave the stray dog a hamburger, and then Walt gave her a dollar to pay his bill. Mary gave him 40 cents change, and Walt yelled, What kind of price are you charging for coffee, Mary? She replied, The coffee's only a dime, Walt, but the dog was your guest, and that was 50 cents for the hamburger. Walt laughed. As you would expect, Walt was well loved and had many fans. At the New York World's Fair, teen-aged girls came up to him and asked him for his autograph. He signed a few autographs, and then he gently took a girl's hands and said, Look, honey, I'm going to get mobbed. I can't sign anymore. She screamed, He touched me! He touched me! 3) Bob Dole considered the late Teddy Kennedy a friend. Mr. Kennedy's mother was born on July 22, and on the first July 22 after she died, Mr. Dole sent Mr. Kennedy a note saying that he was thinking of him and her. Mr. Kennedy wrote back that if his mother were still alive, she would wish him luck in the Presidential election-but not too much luck. 4) Richard Dennis appeared in the play Murder by Death. At the end of Act II, his character was punched in the jaw, so each night he secreted a pouch of stage blood in his mouth so that during the fight scene he could let a trickle of blood run down his chin. Unfortunately, one night he accidentally bit into the pouch too early, and he was forced to cover up the accident by apologizing to the other characters about his bleeding gums. 5) A caddy at the Royal and Ancient Golf Club at St. Andrews in Scotland once received a three-penny tip. Even though this happened a long time ago, three pennies was not a good tip. The caddy looked at the three pennies, then told the golfer he had caddied for that he could tell his for-tune from the three pennies. Then he explained that he learned from the first penny, Yer no' a Scotsman. The second penny told him, Yer no' married. Finally, the caddy said, The third one tells me that yer father wasn't married either.

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