Overview

Our Separated Lives is a father's perspective on the Forced Adoption Era in 1970s Australia. There is very little written about this-the fathers of nearly 10,000 children adopted in 1970, or any other year, are notably silent. This heartfelt memoir encompasses the consequences of forced adoption, including profound regret, loss, and abandonment for all parties. It's a story of coercion and control, and how people 'stepping in' caused long term damage to the birth parents and the adopted child. It also examines the reunion with the adopted child and the implications of meeting them for the first time as an adult. Reunions are significant, but they don't make everything right. It can still be a rocky road from there!

Full Product Details

9780646715315

Table of Contents

Reviews

This book drew me in and kept me turning the pages. 'Our Separated Lives' takes us beyond the facts of forced adoption and the societal norms of the day. It is written with heart wrenching honesty about the decisions that were made on Phil's behalf that left him totally stranded, humiliated, and confused. As a birth mother from the forced adoption era, Phil's experiences touched me personally. I often say, ""Adoption affects so many more people than just the mother and baby."" Here we have a father's experience of the influence of family, friends and religion, and the government policies that tore young lives apart. Written in an engaging open style with insights into adoption and social work practices past and present, 'Our Separated Lives' offers a vital new perspective on understanding the causes and consequences of adoption. A 'must read' for anyone touched by adoption. Di Riddell Author of 'Beyond Abuse' and 'Speak Out: From Suppression to Expression' In exploring his journey, Phil has sought to better understand not only his own story as a father who lost a daughter to adoption in 1970, but also the experiences of adopted people. His motivation is clear: to build a stronger, more understanding relationship with his daughter, while walking alongside others in the adoption community. In doing so, he has quietly supported many adopted people and parents who have lost children to adoption-listening with empathy, sharing his perspective with humility, and asking thoughtful questions that reflect his genuine desire to learn. Phil's book, 'Our Separated Lives', is an extension of the man himself-raw, honest, and unafraid to articulate the longing, complexity, and fragility of adoption and reunion. Many times while reading, I was moved to tears by the way he captures emotions that so many feel but cannot find the words to express. Phil's voice is one that matters in the adoption conversation, and I am grateful for his courage in sharing it. Dr Jo-Ann Sparrow President, Jigsaw Queensland Congratulations Philip J Kenward on having the courage to share your story with the world. A powerful and compelling account, told with very real and raw emotion; I had to keep turning the page. I also enjoyed how Philip reminisced about his early childhood, especially the thunder box in the back yard and the lolly cigarettes. I could relate to Philip's emotional journey, as I am married to one of those fathers whose first daughter was adopted at birth. Although his story is vastly different and one we don't often speak about, I recognise the same range of emotions in him. I applaud, Phil, that the facts around forced adoption have been revealed, and can say from my own experience it was still practiced in 1975. I was also pressured coercively, but I was one of the lucky ones as my parents backed me to keep my son. Thank you, Phil, for sharing such a powerful story. Rita-Marie Lenton, Funeral Celebrant and Author

Author Information

Tab Content 6

Countries Available