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Awards
OverviewFull Product DetailsAuthor: Judith R. SmithPublisher: Rowman & Littlefield Imprint: Rowman & Littlefield Dimensions: Width: 14.60cm , Height: 2.20cm , Length: 22.50cm Weight: 0.467kg ISBN: 9781538138885ISBN 10: 1538138883 Pages: 280 Publication Date: 27 January 2022 Audience: General/trade , General Format: Hardback Publisher's Status: Active Availability: Manufactured on demand  We will order this item for you from a manufactured on demand supplier. Table of ContentsAcknowledgements Author’s Note Part One Intro– Through A Mother’s Eyes Chapter 1: What is a Difficult Adult Child? Chapter 2: Once a Mother, Always a Mother? Chapter 3: Give Me Shelter Chapter 4: Shame and Blame Chapter 5: Torn in Two Chapter 6: Mental Illness in the Family Chapter 7: Who Cares for the Mentally Ill? Chapter 8: Substance Abuse in the Family Chapter 9: Chromic Sorrow Chapter 10: Violence in the Family Chapter 11: Pain of the Past Part Two Intro– Small Steps Chapter 12: Stages of Change Chapter 13: Seeing and Not Seeing Chapter 14: Self-Assessment Part Three Intro– Helping yourself Chapter 15: Social Support Chapter 16: Self-care Chapter 17: Staying Safe Chapter 18: Helping Your Adult Child Get Help Chapter 19: What comes next? Appendix A: Resources for Mothers and Adult Children Appendix B: Research Methodology Appendix C: The Mothers Difficult: Mothering through conflict and commitment Table of Contents NotesIndex About the AuthorReviewsAs a mother who lived with and lost an adult child with substance use issues, I always felt very alone. Difficult made me realize that so many mothers struggle as I did, and that there is not one right answer for everyone. Parents do so much for their children, but they cannot help them with this. I thought this book was extremely helpful and a must read.--Eve Goldberg, mother and founder of BigVision.org As a mother, a mental health educator, and an advocate for people affected by mental illness, I am always excited to see books that are devoted to the topic of improving our lives. Dr. Smith's book takes on some of the toughest topics out there, which can be packed with emotion and fear. She addresses these topics by including valuable information interspersed with perspectives from people with lived experience. The consistent messages throughout are that you are not alone and you have to take care of yourself to be able to take care of those you love.--Teri Brister, PhD, LPC, national director research, support & education, NAMI As the mother of an adult child with mental illness, I'd been searching for a book like Difficult for too long. The burden of never-ending parenthood requires unfathomable endurance, costs time and money, and promises nothing in return. The journey is full of isolation and despair and judgment. At a certain point, hope itself feels too optimistic--we aim for daily survival instead. But who can sustain the unsustainable alone? Maternal love can feel like a paradoxical trap, where love is both too much and never enough. Difficult is an essential book for parents of difficult adult children. Difficult acknowledges that individual mothers vary in where they're at, in what they can and cannot tolerate. I imagine many readers, myself included, will wisely revisit this book numerous times along this most difficult of parenting journeys.--Jennifer Gilman, mother of a difficult adult child Difficult spotlights a mostly hidden problem and shows how re-framing can lead to creative problem solving. The labels we give to our troubled adult children--mentally ill, addict, criminal--are pejorative and lead only to shame and guilt in everyone concerned. When we consider someone or a situation as difficult, we can take a breath and consider the possibilities for change. Smith refreshingly places these issues solidly in a cultural context, offers myriad examples of different paths these mothers have taken, and provides a solid list of resources. What a helpful book!--Carol H. Munter and Jane R. Hirschmann, authors, Overcoming Overeating This is an important and much-needed book. Professor Smith examines the many ways that mothers are profoundly affected by the struggles, sorrows, and needs of their adult children. I'll be recommending it widely not only to parents, but to my colleagues. Difficult explores a neglected area of research and guidance that families, psychologists, and physicians, can learn from.--Joshua Coleman, PhD, psychologist, and author of Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict I am someone who has lived in fear in my own home, afraid of my own adult son. This book brings to light the unfair AND unsafe burden that has been placed on families of adult children with serious brain illnesses and substance use disorders. I hope every legislator, health care provider, social worker, and community leader reads this book and is moved to create the much-needed treatment policy changes, funding, and #HousingThatHeals for our adult children living with serious brain illnesses and substance use disorders.--Leslie Carpenter, IA mental health advocate My father, my grandmother's only child, was wrapped around her apron strings and purse strings that were tangled up to define a dependency that manifested chronic abuse. I wish I had Difficult to read as I helped save my grandmother; more, I wish she had Diffcult to read, to help prevent her abuse; most, I know Difficult will help many mothers, today.--Philip C. Marshall, elder justice advocate, grandson of Brooke Astor, NYC philanthropist This is an eye-opening book for many mothers, who may blame themselves for their adult child's serious struggles. Smith tackles serious topics that are often considered off-limits, even within the family circle, like drug abuse, chronic unemployment, mental health problems, and violence. By combining solid research and evidence-based approaches with personal narratives of mothers across the sociodemographic spectrum, Smith helps readers make sense of how and why guilt, shame, love, and fear can drive behaviors that puts women's own needs and well-being last--because that's what mothers do. Just as critical are practical assessments and guidelines for self-care, stopping the enabling behavior, and getting help for themselves and their adult children. Every mother who has serious challenges with their adult child should read this book.--Liz Seegert, health journalist The difficulties of having an adult child with problems, particularly those who are mentally ill, abusing substances, or violent is often overlooked by mental health professionals, the media, and the public. Any mother with difficult children who reads this will undoubtedly no longer feel so alone. It is a book of despair and of hope, anger and love.--Nancy R. Hooyman, professor and dean emeriti, University of Washington School of Social Work This fine book will be profoundly helpful to all the women who needed it yesterday. At last, we have a book on the subject of difficult children that is profoundly sympathetic with and empathic toward mothers. It is excellent cultural therapy.--Mary Pipher, author of Reviving Ophelia and Women Rowing North We all know parents who are struggling with their difficult grown children. They would do well to read Difficult, a wise and insightful book. Judith Smith tells the hard family stories and offers both compassion and hope.--Jane Isay, author of Unconditional Love: A Guide to Navigating the Joys and Challenges of Being a Grandparent Today This fine book will be profoundly helpful to all the women who needed it yesterday. At last, we have a book on the subject of difficult children that is profoundly sympathetic with and empathic toward mothers. It is excellent cultural therapy.--Mary Pipher, #1 New York Times-bestselling author This is a must-read book for every single family who has an adult child living with an untreated and under-treated serious brain illness and/or substance use disorder in our country. Too many moms (and dads) endure too much abuse and fear while attempting to do what the health care system won't: actually treat and house their adult children who live with these horrible illnesses, especially those who have Anosognosia and can't participate in treatment because their brain illnesses themselves cause them to be unaware of their need for treatment.--Leslie Carpenter, IA mental health advocate Author InformationJudith R. Smith, PhD, LCSW, is a leader in gerontological research focusing on women's experiences as they age. She is a senior clinical social worker, psychotherapist, and professor of social work at Fordham University. She lives in New York City with her husband. Tab Content 6Author Website:Countries AvailableAll regions |
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