Overview

With medical science, health care and healthy lifestyles extending our life spans as never before, more and more 'midlife' adults are finding themselves caring for their aging parents. This role can trigger not only logistical and financial challenges, but also great emotional upheaval. There is a reversal of roles as the ""child"" - often in the midst of raising his or her own adolescent or young adult offspring - becomes the carer of the parent. A parent's aging and mortality elicits strong feelings of loss, and a stark realization of one's own aging and mortality. Past, present and future paths converge, and the carer is at the centre of that crossroads. Psychologist Praver - a specialist working with such carers - shows us their inner worlds, and how they used a difficult point in their lives to embark on a journey of self-understanding and self-transformation - a journey toward a more meaningful life for themselves. Readers can gain a better understanding of their own lives - and know they are not alone in their struggles to contend with and find powerful benefits from the emotional side of caring for an aging parent. Distress can become peace of mind, as we see in the stories o

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9780275981839

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Reviews

Interacting with our aging parents, and/or with our children as their aging parents, has become a quite universal life passage, still largely unexplored in the psychological literature. Dr. Praver's book discusses it from the point of view of contemporary psychoanalysis, ...it would be a valuable companion to anyone navigating through the difficulties of aging within significant intergenerational relationships. -Gladys Guarton, Faculty and Supervisor Derner Institute of Advanced Psychological Studies Adelphi University

A highly sophisticated, insightful self-help book on how to deal with your aging parents and your aging self. It helps you to understand who you are. -Yehuda Nir, M.D., author of The Lost Childhood and Associate Professor of Psychiatry, Cornell University Medical School By using gripping case histories to provide invaluable insights, Dr. Cohen Praver encourages the reader to move beyond the crossroads of stress and heightened trauma--and use one's 'gift of time' to embrace the road that is positive and life-affirming. -Virginia F. Sendor, co-author of Hospice and Palliative Care: Questions and Answers Dr. Praver delivers an informed and personal view of what psychology and psychiatry can offer.... Praver demystifies the process of psychotherapy and simplifies psychoanalysis, in a realistic unassuming manner for a lay public. Yet the same understandable chapters also deliver fertile, sophisticated insights for students and practicing clinicians in the field. -Julia A. Becker, M.D., Practicing Board Certified Psychiatrist Long Island, New York Dr. Praver informatively presents complex ideas about our interactions with people, and particularly our aging parents, without compromising the integrity of the theoretical concepts. Her many case examples are lively, evocative and her writing style is suitable to both a lay and professional audience. -Roberta Jellinek, Ph.D., Psychoanalyst and Psychotherapist, private practice New York City Interacting with our aging parents, and/or with our children as their aging parents, has become a quite universal life passage, still largely unexplored in the psychological literature. Dr. Praver's book discusses it from the point of view of contemporary psychoanalysis, ...it would be a valuable companion to anyone navigating through the difficulties of aging within significant intergenerational relationships. -Gladys Guarton, Faculty and Supervisor Derner Institute of Advanced Psychological Studies Adelphi University Many of us will have to care for our aging parents while contending with the reality that we too are growing old. In [this] insightful book, Dr. Praver describes our personal and spiritual enlightenment as we reverse caretaking roles with our parents. -Robert Reich, M.D., Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry Mount Sinai School of Medicine New York Read this book and learn how to save your life by living with the knowledge that your time is limited. It will help you to find your chocolate ice cream and live out your life consuming it. -Bernie Siegel, M.D., author of Help Me to Heal and 365 Prescriptions for the Soul Unlike most other books on caring for an aging parent, this one emphasizes the opportunities for middle-aged caregivers to grow and change as they negotiate the demands of aging parents and, often at the same time, those of the increasingly independent adolescent and young adult children....[i]nsightful. Public libraries will want to purchase it for the many baby boomers now facing these problems and seeking guidance. -Library Journal ?[A]n informative and insightful look at midlife....With her emphasis on midlife as a time for personal enlightenment and growth, Praver encourages readers to embrace this phase of their lives.?-Booklist ?Crossroads at Midlife takes an honest unflinching look at the emotional upheaval that men and women confront at this critical juncture in their own lives...Dr.Frances Cohen Praver's inspirational message of embarking on a journey of exploration and self-transformation in order to create the remaining years with meaning is based on her personal experience....Powerful emotions and inner conflicts evoked by aging parents leave caretakers feeling torn....The author shares therapy tools to help readers take control of inner states so that they can empathize with parents and themselves. Then they can better provide care with kindness and compassion.?-The Leader ?Unlike most other books on caring for an aging parent, this one emphasizes the opportunities for middle-aged caregivers to grow and change as they negotiate the demands of aging parents and, often at the same time, those of the increasingly independent adolescent and young adult children....[i]nsightful. Public libraries will want to purchase it for the many baby boomers now facing these problems and seeking guidance.?-Library Journal YAn informative and insightful look at midlife....With her emphasis on midlife as a time for personal enlightenment and growth, Praver encourages readers to embrace this phase of their lives. -Booklist [A]n informative and insightful look at midlife....With her emphasis on midlife as a time for personal enlightenment and growth, Praver encourages readers to embrace this phase of their lives. -Booklist Crossroads at Midlife takes an honest unflinching look at the emotional upheaval that men and women confront at this critical juncture in their own lives...Dr.Frances Cohen Praver's inspirational message of embarking on a journey of exploration and self-transformation in order to create the remaining years with meaning is based on her personal experience....Powerful emotions and inner conflicts evoked by aging parents leave caretakers feeling torn....The author shares therapy tools to help readers take control of inner states so that they can empathize with parents and themselves. Then they can better provide care with kindness and compassion. -The Leader

Author Information

FRANCES COHEN PRAVER, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and psychoanalyst working primarily with middle-aged people and couples caring for aging parents. She has appeared on television shows including Good Morning America and The Phil Donahue Show, and has lectured on trauma and traumatic stress in Grand Rounds at several hospitals.

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