Overview

The word caregiver typically suggests someone doing all the giving for a frail, physically challenged, or aging person, who is doing all the receiving. Marty Richards proposes a rebalanced approach of caresharing. From this perspective, the cared for and the carer share a deep sense of connection. Each has strengths and resources. Each can teach the other. Each can share in grief, hope, wisdom and forgiveness. The book's focus is to help caregivers realise that they are not alone in their journey. Richards broadens the scope of the give-and-take relationship to include multigenerational families and faith communities, looking at the strengths each has to offer in the caregiving network. In order to keep the spirit alive, Richards offers a mulitlayered, reciprocal process: * The Dance of Sharing Care * Sharing Wisdom: What the Frail Teach the Well * Sharing Roles: Reinventing Family Roles in Sharing Care * Sharing Soul to Soul : A Special Relationship with People with Dementia * Sharing Grief: Dealing with the Little Losses and the Big Ones * Sharing Forgiveness: A Key Spiritual Journey * Sharing Hope and Heart: An Active Process One Step at a Time

Full Product Details

Author:   Marty Richards
Publisher:   Jewish Lights Publishing
Imprint:   SkyLight Paths Publishing,US
Dimensions:   Width: 15.30cm , Height: 2.80cm , Length: 23.00cm
Weight:   0.001kg
ISBN:  

9781594732478

ISBN 10:   1594732477
Pages:   250
Publication Date:   06 May 2009
Audience:   General/trade ,  General
Replaced By:   9781594732867
Format:   Hardback
Publisher's Status:   Out of Print
Availability:   Out of stock  

Table of Contents

Prelude xi 1 THE DANCE OF SHARING CARE 1 An Invitation to Share Care 1 A New Vision for Sharing Care 2 The Basic Steps of the Caresharing Dance 7 Expanding the Caresharing Network 13 The Body/Mind/Spirit Connection 21 When Things Get Complicated 30 2 SHARING WISDOM: WHAT THE FRAIL TEACH THE WELL 37 Inner Wisdom 37 Clearing the Way 39 Putting Yourself in the Role of a Learner 42 Gaining New Understanding from Stories 51 Receiving Spiritual Strength 54 3 FAMILIES SHARING THE CARE: REINVENTING THE ROLES AND RULES 58 Family Systems 58 Family Roles 60 Family Rules 72 Family Secrets 78 4 SHARING SOUL TO SOUL : A SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP WITH PEOPLE WITH COGNITIVE LIMITS 83 Facing Difficult Challenges 83 Understanding the Stages of Dementia 84 Building Effective Communication 93 Keeping the Spirit Alive 100 Dealing with Difficult Behaviors 105 Connecting Soul to Soul 107 5 SHARING GRIEF: COPING WITH THE LARGE AND THE LITTLE LOSSES 118 The Presence of Grief 118 Facing Transitions 119 Facing Losses 120 Dimensions of Grief 127 Grief Responses 138 Coping with Grief 141 Spiritual Dimensions of Grief 147 6 SHARING FORGIVENESS: A KEY SPIRITUAL JOURNEY IN CARESHARING 155 The Importance of Forgiveness 155 The Nature of Forgiveness 158 The Barriers to Forgiveness 160 Relationship Matters 165 Daily Matters 168 Where to Start 172 Spiritual Dimensions of Forgiveness 180 Reconciliation 183 7 SHARING HOPE: AN ACTIVE PROCESS ONE STEP AT A TIME 188 The Importance of Hope in Caresharing 188 Definitions of Hope 190 Four Key Aspects of Hope 193 Keeping Hope Alive 200 An Action Plan for Building on Hope 206 Postlude 223 Suggestions for Further Reading 225 Acknowledgments 227

Reviews

Opens up a world of possibilities of ways to 'share' the caring experience and provides a detailed path to support people on their own journey. --Rev. Gwen Brandfass, chair, Forum on Religion, Spirituality and Aging (a constituent group of the American Society on Aging) Offers precious wisdom and comfort.... Points the way for caregiver and care receiver to learn, grow, heal and thrive amidst soul-searing challenges. --Rabbi Dayle A. Friedman, director, Hiddur: The Center for Aging and Judaism, Reconstructionist Rabbinical College; author, Jewish Visions for Aging: A Professional Guide for Fostering Wholeness The perfect handbook for anyone called to give or receive care. Brims with wise counsel, inspiring stories and practical resources. Offers a fresh and hopeful vision of mutual relationships to help us realize this graced togetherness. --Kathleen Fischer, PhD, author, Winter Grace: Spirituality and Aging A creative and vital new approach to caring. Provides an honest, down-to-earth approach to the emotional, physical and spiritual needs of the caregiver and the care receiver. A great blessing and benefit to all persons involved in caring relationships. --Dr. Richard H. Gentzler, Jr., director, Center on Aging and Older Adult Ministries, The United Methodist Church Nothing less than masterful. Richards' concrete and profound perspective on hope and how hope affects caresharing is a wonderful addition to existing literature on caregiving and care receiving. Needs to be read by every caregiver and care receiver as well as their families and friends. --Rev. Donald Koepke, director emeritus, California Lutheran Homes Center for Spirituality and Aging Gently but thoroughly confronts the myth of independence. We are in this life together. A must read for all pastors and parish life directors. --Rev. James P. Oberle, S.S., PhD, director, Holy Spirit Center, Anchorage, Alaska An inspiration to many of us in the field of Alzheimer's care. Touches the spirit in all of us, teaches and inspires. Highly recommended. --David Troxel, coauthor, The Best Friends Approach to Alzheimer's Care Caresharing approaches the complexities of aging, illness or disability with an emphasis on mutual sharing of care, interdependence, affirmation, lovingkindness and understanding. Providing care is not a solitary journey, but a relational one, the author asserts in the introduction. Giving and receiving care offer an opportunity to recognize what is most deeply human and most deeply divine in the other. Richards encourages reciprocal care between caregiver and receiver as well as others providing support. This approach she calls caresharing. When readers accept Richards' invitation to shift from caregiving to caresharing, she suggests, they will feel less alone, more connected and more hopeful. The book has shown me that my experiences of caring for my wife are meaningful and part of the universal human experience of caring. Until about a year ago, I cared for my wife Ruth, who lives with Alzheimer's, at home, mostly on my own. Since moving her to the nursing care facility across from my cottage, I continue to spend most of the day with her; enjoying her, feeding her at mealtimes and eating beside her. We are experiencing the reality of caresharing each day. My wife and I work together with the health care staff and residents as a community. I highly recommend this hopeful book to anyone caring for a loved one. --Robert Harnish Connections Newsletter (06/01/2013) Odds are favorable that at some point in each of our lives, we will be called upon to care for a loved one due to illness or infirmity. Those who have either served in such a capacity or who have required the care of another know that it can be overwhelmingly stressful. In Caresharing, Marty Richards draws upon her four decades as a clinical social worker and her own personal experience caring for a family member to redefine the roles of caregiver and care recipient in a way that can change the experience into an opportunity for growth for all. By tapping into the strengths of each, the Caresharing approach transforms the traditional give-and-take relationship of caregiving into a dynamic of reciprocal interdependence Richards provides numerous practical suggestions for forming a relationship of mutual love and respect, for building a network of spiritual and congregational support and for exploring other resources for assistance, all rounded out with a bibliography for further reading. This would be a handy resource for any congregational library. --Robet Lewis Congregational Libraries Today (01/01/2010) Opens up a world of possibilities of ways to 'share' the caring experience and provides a detailed path to support people on their own journey. Rev. Gwen Brandfass, chair, Forum on Religion, Spirituality and Aging (a constituent group of the American Society on Aging) Offers precious wisdom and comfort.... Points the way for caregiver and care receiver to learn, grow, heal and thrive amidst soul-searing challenges. Rabbi Dayle A. Friedman, director, Hiddur: The Center for Aging and Judaism, Reconstructionist Rabbinical College; author, Jewish Visions for Aging: A Professional Guide for Fostering Wholeness The perfect handbook for anyone called to give or receive care. Brims with wise counsel, inspiring stories and practical resources. Offers a fresh and hopeful vision of mutual relationships to help us realize this graced togetherness. Kathleen Fischer, PhD, author, Winter Grace: Spirituality and Aging A creative and vital new approach to caring. Provides an honest, down-to-earth approach to the emotional, physical and spiritual needs of the caregiver and the care receiver. A great blessing and benefit to all persons involved in caring relationships. Dr. Richard H. Gentzler, Jr., director, Center on Aging and Older Adult Ministries, The United Methodist Church Nothing less than masterful. Richards' concrete and profound perspective on hope and how hope affects caresharing is a wonderful addition to existing literature on caregiving and care receiving. Needs to be read by every caregiver and care receiver as well as their families and friends. Rev. Donald Koepke, director emeritus, California Lutheran Homes Center for Spirituality and Aging Gently but thoroughly confronts the myth of independence. We are in this life together. A must read for all pastors and parish life directors. Rev. James P. Oberle, S.S., PhD, director, Holy Spirit Center, Anchorage, Alaska An inspiration to many of us in the field of Alzheimer s care. Touches the spirit in all of us, teaches and inspires. Highly recommended. David Troxel, coauthor, The Best Friends Approach to Alzheimer s Care Caresharing approaches the complexities of aging, illness or disability with an emphasis on mutual sharing of care, interdependence, affirmation, lovingkindness and understanding. Providing care is not a solitary journey, but a relational one, the author asserts in the introduction. Giving and receiving care offer an opportunity to recognize what is most deeply human and most deeply divine in the other. Richards encourages reciprocal care between caregiver and receiver as well as others providing support. This approach she calls caresharing. When readers accept Richards' invitation to shift from caregiving to caresharing, she suggests, they will feel less alone, more connected and more hopeful. The book has shown me that my experiences of caring for my wife are meaningful and part of the universal human experience of caring. Until about a year ago, I cared for my wife Ruth, who lives with Alzheimer's, at home, mostly on my own. Since moving her to the nursing care facility across from my cottage, I continue to spend most of the day with her; enjoying her, feeding her at mealtimes and eating beside her. We are experiencing the reality of caresharing each day. My wife and I work together with the health care staff and residents as a community. I highly recommend this hopeful book to anyone caring for a loved one.--Robert Harnish Connections Newsletter (06/01/2013) Odds are favorable that at some point in each of our lives, we will be called upon to care for a loved one due to illness or infirmity. Those who have either served in such a capacity or who have required the care of another know that it can be overwhelmingly stressful. In Caresharing, Marty Richards draws upon her four decades as a clinical social worker and her own personal experience caring for a family member to redefine the roles of caregiver and care recipient in a way that can change the experience into an opportunity for growth for all. By tapping into the strengths of each, the Caresharing approach transforms the traditional give-and-take relationship of caregiving into a dynamic of reciprocal interdependence Richards provides numerous practical suggestions for forming a relationship of mutual love and respect, for building a network of spiritual and congregational support and for exploring other resources for assistance, all rounded out with a bibliography for further reading. This would be a handy resource for any congregational library.--Robet Lewis Congregational Libraries Today (01/01/2010)

Caresharing approaches the complexities of aging, illness, or disability with an emphasis on mutual sharing of care, interdependence, affirmation, lovingkindness, and understanding. Providing care is not a solitary journey, but a relational one, the author asserts in the introduction. Giving and receiving care offer an opportunity to recognize what is most deeply human and most deeply divine in the other. Richards encourages reciprocal care between caregiver and receiver as well as others providing support. This approach she calls caresharing. When readers accept Richards' invitation to shift from caregiving to caresharing, she suggests, they will feel less alone, more connected, and more hopeful.The book has shown me that my experiences of caring for my wife are meaningful and part of the universal human experience of caring. Until about a year ago, I cared for my wife Ruth, who lives with Alzheimer s, at home, mostly on my own. Since moving her to the nursing care facility across from my cottage, I continue to spend most of the day with her; enjoying her, feeding her at mealtimes, and eating beside her. We are experiencing the reality of caresharing each day. My wife and I work together with the health care staff and residents as a community. I highly recommend this hopeful book to anyone caring for a loved one.--Robert Harnish Connections Newsletter (06/01/2013)

Opens up a world of possibilities of ways to 'share' the caring experience and provides a detailed path to support people on their own journey. Rev. Gwen Brandfass, chair, Forum on Religion, Spirituality and Aging (a constituent group of the American Society on Aging) Offers precious wisdom and comfort.... Points the way for caregiver and care receiver to learn, grow, heal and thrive amidst soul-searing challenges. Rabbi Dayle A. Friedman, director, Hiddur: The Center for Aging and Judaism, Reconstructionist Rabbinical College; author, Jewish Visions for Aging: A Professional Guide for Fostering Wholeness The perfect handbook for anyone called to give or receive care. Brims with wise counsel, inspiring stories, and practical resources. Offers a fresh and hopeful vision of mutual relationships to help us realize this graced togetherness. Kathleen Fischer, PhD, author, Winter Grace: Spirituality and Aging A creative and vital new approach to caring. Provides an honest, down-to-earth approach to the emotional, physical and spiritual needs of the caregiver and the care receiver. A great blessing and benefit to all persons involved in caring relationships. Dr. Richard H. Gentzler, Jr., director, Center on Aging and Older Adult Ministries, The United Methodist Church Nothing less than masterful. Richards concrete and profound perspective on hope and how hope affects caresharing is a wonderful addition to existing literature on caregiving and care receiving. Needs to be read by every caregiver and care receiver as well as their families and friends. Rev. Donald Koepke, director emeritus, California Lutheran Homes Center for Spirituality and Aging Gently but thoroughly confronts the myth of independence. We are in this life together. A must read for all pastors and parish life directors. Rev. James P. Oberle, S.S., PhD, director, Holy Spirit Center, Anchorage, Alaska An inspiration to many of us in the field of Alzheimer s care. Touches the spirit in

Author Information

Marty Richards, a clinical social worker, is an affiliate assistant professor at the University of Washington School of Social Work.

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