Overview

An arrest and conviction for trafficking ecstasy can be comical. The character-strewn path of corrections that followed is entertaining and enlightening. This is the story of a ""book-learnin' smart-ass"" who endured a three-year minimum-security tour of the slammer and lived to make fun of it. And who emerged a humbled and better man.Lookout For Shorts is a departure from hardcore prison fare; it is gonzo and humorous in tone. Picture the worst cruise ship imaginable, full of guests from The Jerry Springer Show, that never reaches a port. Tales abound of inmate absurdities and administrative follies juxtaposed against the coarse subculture of lockup. Along the way, Phillips unflinchingly describes his drug-dealing days, a rehab stint, and his misspent youth.We've all heard of Orange Is the New Black, the fish-out-of-water story that provided a glimpse into a fascinating micro-society. Lookout is similar but zips several steps further into humor. The main hazard the author faced was his head exploding from being immersed in a sea of weirdos and misfits. The nuttiness nearly made him forget about the ever-present threat of losing teeth and suffering fresh scars.Culled from copious journals, most of this tale is prison-based. The story begins with the arrest of a Generation X slacker, for dealing drugs at a jam band concert. Description of an upscale rehab stint and living in an AA-based halfway house follow, then the incarceration hammer comes down. Recounting lockup, Phillips focuses on how the other other half lives and the light-hearted cynicism he found from being there. ""If you ever wanted to be the smartest person in the room, just go to state prison for a while. You'll probably be that guy the whole time,"" quips the author, in Sedaris-like style. Still, he ends up deeply empathizing with his downtrodden fellow felons along the way.Phillips described his odyssey thusly: ""I spent most of my life lying around, killing time. This led me to the slammer, where I lied around, killing time. I ended up in prison because of a lack of dedication, patience, and my failure to postpone gratification. So after my release, I wrote a book, which requires enormous amounts of dedication, patience, and postponing gratification. It's a start!""

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9781734857504

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Reviews

I like funny. I like prison stories. I liked all of these funny prison stories. - Critique writer on scribophile.com _________________________________ A searing indictment of America's underfunded and substandard prison memoirists. - Elizabeth Warren staffer __________________________________ A magnificent achievement in autobiography, Now, please follow me on Twitter. - Guy who uses Starbucks as an office ___________________________________ Stunning! Like, I mean, that the Garrett I know finished writing a whole book. - A Phillips relative ___________________________________ A gut-shiving story. -Toothbrush carver ____________________________________ The copious tax dollars we sank into this guy's incarceration suddenly seems worth it. - Random church preacher ___________________________________ This book proves second chance success stories aren't just for Bill Cosby. - Amateur sociologist

A searing indictment of America's underfunded and substandard prison memoirists. - Elizabeth Warren staffer _________________________________ A magnificent achievement in autobiography, in that the writer seems never to have met the author. - Guy who uses Starbucks as an office __________________________________ He probably ain't lyin'. - Former fellow inmate ___________________________________ Stunning! Like, I mean, that the Garrett I know finished writing a whole book. - A Phillips relative ___________________________________ I like funny. I like prison stories. And if it ever gets published I'll probably like more of these funny prison stories. - Critique writer on scribophile.com ____________________________________ A gut-shiving story. -Toothbrush carver ____________________________________ Reading the tales of this reformed felon, one worries about how many tax dollars we sank into this. - Random church preacher ____________________________________ Garrett Phillips is far taller in person than you'd expect. And Lookout for Shorts is an okay read. - Asian tourist ___________________________________ This book tells jailing like it is. Not that I would know, I've never been to prison. You touch my dessert, you die. - Non former fellow inmate ___________________________________ This book proves second chances may be a total myth. But it's readable. - Amateur sociologist

Author Information

Phillips is a humanist humorist or vice versa, born and raised in Canton, Ohio. He lived nearly thirty years in Atlanta and recently resided in Los Angeles pursuing writing and podcasting projects before COVID-19 ran him out of town. Currently in Richmond, Va., near family. The author created The Tree Fort Report podcast, which he has hosted and produced since March of 2020. Phillips formerly occupied himself as an on-air morning radio talent, stand-up comic, courier, golf instructor, waiter, video blog host, and chauffeur, among other follies. He attended Georgia State University and always wants to hit a golf ball.

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